It's a...

We were thrilled today to see the youngest member of our family kicking playfully on the ultrasound monitor. It was beyond a delight to watch our second son's heart beat, see small arms move up to his precious face, glimpse his sweet little profile, watch tiny fingers and toes wiggle—and to discover he is a boy (all 8 ounces of him—not surprisingly, a little bigger than the average baby at this stage).

I can't help but imagine what he'll be like (I do hope for a good sleeper like Jack!), and if he'll look like our eldest or totally different. It's such a special mystery and privilege of parenthood, to dream and wonder about the baby who's carefully nestled inside you—closer than he'll ever be again—but whom you haven't truly met. I'm confident and so grateful that God is shaping the life inside me and preparing our family for our new little boy.

Jack wasn't that enthusiastic about having to sit relatively still in a dark room with no toys (despite our prior attempted explanations that we would get to see our baby on the screen) but was later thrilled to look through the ultrasound photos with us. He's pretty excited (as he can be with his limited understanding) about having "baby brother." We're excited, too, to continue to love and parent the boys as they grow up together. We can't wait to see them race their Hot Wheels, run outside, ride their bikes, play catch, and make lots of special brother memories.

Thank you, God, for blessing us with another sweet little guy!

Jack's new book

I just got a new story book,

And a new shirt for a brand-new look.

Why? Because I'm happy to say

My little sibling is on the way!

All three of us are looking forward to welcoming a precious little one next June (although Jack tends to think the baby is in his tummy from time to time). We are beyond thankful to God for this tiny, beautiful miracle; we couldn't feel more blessed! It's been a bit of a journey to get to this point (in which I've learned more about God's incredible timing and about the essential virtue of patience) and that makes us all the more grateful, with more of a sense of amazement and a perhaps even a deeper joy.

Last week, we saw our little guy or gal (the extreme fuzzy version) on ultrasound and heard his or her wonderfully rhythmic heartbeat for the first time. What a phenomenal God we have to create the wonder of new life!

Now begins the guessing game...boy or girl? My husband thinks girl. I have no clue. We shall see!

Caution: Fun Zone!

Jack loves trucks (and cars). He races big ones around the house at high speed and plays for a long time with little ones, driving them over tabletops and furniture and Mommy and Daddy and himself. He calls each a "ruck." So this year his party was all about trucks and other construction vehicles—and dirt, of course.

We had various snacks, including Muddy Buddies (not shown), served with a toy shovel. Yum! I had never made them before, but I may make them again :-). The tablecloth was the "road" (thanks to a creative mom  for this and other party inspiration). And I was excited to find truck balloons at the dollar store. 

It was a super fun party to plan. (I have to admit that I adore planning parties. It's just got a whole lot more fun since I've had a little guy. My husband teases that I start planning one party before the current one is even over. He's exaggerating—but just a bit.) While I love to spend plenty of time collecting ideas online and finding thematic products to make the party extra splendid, I still have a ton to do the week before the actual party. Ha! (I'll probably never quite kick my super-ingrained procrastination habits.)

Of course, a party's not a party without people to join in and celebrate, and we're really grateful for everyone who made it fun.

Some of the loads of fun we had:

Eating dirt (crushed Oreos, pudding, cake, gummy worms) cake!

 

We had games, a craft, a pinata and trucks for play.  A wonderful friend let us borrow her stoplight for extra fun.

We decorated with caution tape and "road signs" (and balloons and streamers of course). (I found some signs at Mardel and printed some off that I found online or adapted.) All of the kids got a construction hat and a party horn.

Favor bags—I love having fun with candy molds; these ones were dump trucks. And candy rocks, as it turns out, are delish!

Now, off to third birthday party planning! Just kidding (sort of). I do already have a possible theme in mind...

Tall shoulders

We had fun celebrating Dad yesterday. Since Jack can't talk yet, I made a sign for him to give Daddy when he woke up: "Happy Father's Day, Daddy!" Then it was off to the grocery store to pick up Dad's favorite breakfast: doughnuts. Before we left for church, he and Jack opened his gifts and cards.

We had a couple family dinners to go to yesterday, so we were pretty busy, but even then my husband found time to demonstrate his good dad skills, changing some diapers (even though I told him he didn't have to on Father's Day). We also sneaked in a lovely all-family nap.

Thank you for being a wonderful Daddy and giving us your big heart and strong, tall shoulders! We love you!

And a big hug to our dads, who took such a great deal of time and energy and love to shape us into the people we are today—and still give much. We're grateful for and love you!

Say "Awww"

My sister-in-law had her tiny little boy yesterday. He is simply perfect. And he has perfect, soft, black hair. Her and her husband have a beautiful family.

As we took turns holding him, my husband remarked that he couldn't quite remember Jack being that small. It was strange to think that just a year ago we had embarked on the world of parenting with a teeny bundle of our own. Now, he looks like a giant next to his newborn cousin.

It was also odd to peek into the very same hospital room where I had held my son for the first time and remember all the emotions and well wishes and, despite reading gobs and watching videos and attending childbirth classes, how extremely clueless I was about parenthood.

I think Jack seemed big at the time because he seemed like such a big deal. A big responsibility. A huge representation of change in our lives. He was placed in our arms for the next 18 years at least. We loved him more than we could express, but it was a bit overwhelming.

Now we're enjoying parenthood immensely and learning to take it one day at a time, and to enjoy little Jack's journey and our own.

And I have to admit holding the precious little guy made me think about making Jack a big brother someday.

A little look back

A year ago, we took Jack's first photo with his big bear. Our little guy was just three days old.

Since then, the bear seems to have shrunk substantially. And he is now sporting a fine little party hat.

A Barnyard of First Birthday Fun

Jack is one today.

That means one whole year has passed since those 12 hours of labor and ensuing C-section and waking up from the anesthesia to a brand new baby—and a whole new beautiful life with him. I remember coming to and thinking, in my morphine-engulfed state, "I just had a baby. I had a baby. Somewhere in this hospital is my baby." I asked the kind nurse all about him—how much he weighed, how he looked—and after what seemed like forever my husband stood at the door of the room with a little hospital-blanket-wrapped bundle.

I didn't look like those mommies who are made up and ready for photo ops. I looked completely awful—sweat-soaked hair, glasses, and all. I felt more than out of it from all the medication the surgery necessitated and the surprise C-section and the previous hours of labor. My husband placed him in my arms; I held baby Jack and just stared and him. I had waited to see what no ultrasound could reveal for so long. He was mine.

Fast-forward a year. So much has changed. He's grown tall (as in more than the 95th percentile tall) and has a cute little personality. He giggles and crawls and loves to be tickled. He's all boy, exploring, climbing, and reaching for everything. He splashes in his bath and intently watches Daddy work on home improvement projects. He does other not-so-adorable things, like throwing food off of his high chair tray, and letting out angry little shrieks when he doesn't get that thing he so desperately wants.

To celebrate his big first birthday, we turned our backyard into a little "farm" with a fish pond, hay field, petting zoo, chicken coop, and craft barn (all pretend of course), and invited some folks to join in on the fun. We decked out a farm-and-animal cake (see the instructions), played games, gave out barnyard-themed prizes (everyone wins when you're that small), and served up "cow pies" and "hay stacks" (cookies). The party culminated with the big cake-tasting by Jack himself. Once he figured out the cupcake animal was indeed edible, he ate it. And ate it. He only got a few crumbs on his shirt (we dressed him in it with the thought it would be nearly destroyed) because he was so excited about eating it. He also loved his first taste of ice cream.

One little baby and one short year has changed my world in the biggest—and happiest—ways imaginable.

The food table, with a wheelbarrow holding drinks

The cake

A banner of monthly photos

Jack loved his party guests pulling him around in his new wagon.

Playing games: fishing, finding eggs, and sticking the tail on the donkey (or on its stomach, actually)

Discovering how much he loves cake

Our birthday boy, ready for his nap after the big bash

So blessed

Sometimes in the midst of life, I forget. Three poopy diapers and a crazy day of deadlines and worrying about family photos turning out and cleaning my house frantically kind of rolled in a like a fog today.

It's days like these at a frenetic pace that I feel trapped, as if I need to take a step back and really see life. And then life comes into focus again when, for example, my little munchkin falls asleep on my lap, and I take a bit of time to reflect.

And I think: Really, what am I doing? How did I get here? All of a sudden, here I am, all grown up. I've had my dream wedding, complete with poofy white dress and antique car. I've spent years with the man who God designed to be my mate—laughing, talking, traveling down the journey of life. Now I have a little boy just shy of a year old. I have a flexible job with a gracious employer that lets me be a mom and still keep my brain in gear and my skills polished. My husband has a flexible job with an outstanding employer (himself), allowing him to be an even more wonderful daddy to Jack. We take family walks or go to the park in the afternoon sometimes, just because we can.

Really, my life is bursting with blessings. And that is what I want to keep in the forefront of my mind, especially when the days seem overwhelming.

Thank you, God!

A very happy little Easter

Everything—especially Easter—becomes a bit more delightful with a little one in tow. Something about the beauty of the Resurrection and of new beginnings and of spring winds and blooming flowers makes the heart a little lighter.

Conveniently, Jack recently learned how to put items into a container, so that will be helpful when we have our own little Easter egg hunt tomorrow. He got some practice (below) at a playgroup Easter party.

Oh, the wonder of spring!

Our wee miracle

He's here!

John "Jack" Stephen Phillips was born Saturday, May 16 at 7:14 p.m. He weighed in at 8 pounds, 15 ounces and measured 20.25 inches long. He has an adorable little bit of brown hair and loves to make very expressive faces. So far, his favorite hobbies are eating and sleeping.

The birth—an emergency c-section—went quite a bit different than we had imagined, but little Jack is healthy and happy, and that is infinitely more important than any plans we may have had.

We are so blessed to be his parents and to share his little life!

Grandma holding baby Jack in the hospital

Just a few days!

It's so difficult to believe that in just a few days my husband and I will be parents. (The official due date is May 8.) I suppose technically we've been parents for almost nine months, but as my husband puts it, "I'm sure he's a lot easier to take care of in there than he will be out here."

The excitement of meeting our little boy—combined with the anticipation of labor—is almost overwhelming. I'm not sure whether to be overjoyed (I can't wait to hold baby Jack and kiss his little cheeks! Won't it be wonderful to see my husband be a dad!) or just completely panic (Our house is not quite organized for the baby! Will I be a good mom? What if we've forgotten to read up on some critical aspect of childcare?! And labor—yikes!).

Thankfully, the baby is coming soon, no matter how ready I do or do not feel. I am grateful that God is in control of our little family. Last night, some songs on the radio reminded me of how much I needed Him—at this time in my life, and always.

It's a comfort to know God picked us to be parents to Jack, and him to be our son. How honored we are to be blessed with such a beautiful miracle.

And the name is...

We beat our self-set deadline of picking a name for our little boy by April 1, and finally decided this past weekend. We have tossed around so many names it's dizzying, but we've finally settled on a name we both like: Jack.

On his birth certificate, our little guy's official name will be John Stephen Phillips. My husband wants him to have a "proper" name on his birth certificate (as Jack is a nickname for John), and an option to go by John later on in life if he likes.

Jack/John means "God is gracious"—and He certainly is, in the gift of His Son, and the gift of our little boy. It's a beautiful reminder to us as parents, and we hope it will be to Jack, too, as he grows and learns about his Lord. Stephen (pronounced Stephan) is my husband's middle name and his dad's first name.

In just about six weeks, we'll have the honor of holding Jack. It's hard to wait!

Still growing

If I felt like my belly was big before, now it is enormous. Our little boy is about 4.5 pounds and growing rapidly in preparation for his grand entrance into our family. I feel him rolling, moving, and stretching every day. And that is an incomparable joy.

The baby belly, as of today. And I thought I was big two months ago!

This past weekend, family kindly helped us paint his little room. We ended up with one blue wall, two yellow walls, and one wall with both colors (thanks for the great suggestion, Grandpa!), with white trim.

My husband is in the process of installing a ceiling fan and new carpet today. Then, we can collect all the baby furniture and accessories scattered helter-skelter around our house and complete the room. I also ordered a Bible verse to put on the wall above his crib that ties into the nautical theme and teaches him a bit about his Creator: "I worship the Lord, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the land" (Jonah 1:9).

Gotta love growing!

Wrapping up the painting in the nursery. Thanks to family for their hard work!

A little room for a little one

In the past several weeks, we've been accumulating lots of baby items for the nursery and beyond. We even got a new (to us) car, as our two-door car wouldn't be suitable for a baby. It's amazing how much our lives have changed already—and our little boy hasn't yet even poked his head into the world.

Now, we're getting down to the final details, which means we are decorating the nursery. Last weekend, I painted one wall blue; family members are coming over on Saturday to help us paint the rest of it cream. Before they arrive, we'll need to get some furniture out of the room that is moving to other parts of the house. I have some nautical decorations to put up on the walls, and my husband plans to install a ceiling fan and new carpet. Then, we'll bring in the furniture (crib, dresser, rocking chair, and bookcase) and window coverings.

The baby is due to arrive in just eight weeks. I can't wait to have his little room ready for his appearance in the big, wide world.

Gearing up

Lately, we've been accumulating gobs of baby gear for our little one who is due to enter the world in about three months. The nursery (which still contains a double bed we've used for guests) is jam-packed. Having these items makes the whole idea of parenting a little more real.

I was especially grateful for all the good deals God provided for us, including:

• A wooden rocking chair in a furniture store's clearance section
• A dresser my husband's parents gave us (cute childhood furniture of my husband's that happens to match the rocking chair and crib splendidly)
• A coupon we used to save on the high chair
• The exact stroller, playpen, and car seat we wanted at a discount baby store
• A fabulous deal on crib bedding online

Plus, very generous people have given us assorted gear and toys and plenty of adorable little pants, shirts, pajamas, hats, and booties (I especially love a tiny Hawaiian shirt). My sweet sister-in-law and a few kind friends are planning a shower for mid-March, so I'm sure I have a lot more ooohing and aaahing to do.

Now that we've accumulated most of the essentials, there's the hard work of carpeting and painting (OK—my husband's hard work on the carpet) before the real fun of decorating the room begins. The bedding and decor will be in a nautical theme, a thrifty move since I'm transferring many of the decorations from another room.

I can't wait to welcome our baby into his little world!

I envisioned having a traditional, wooden rocking chair.
The blanket on the back is part of the nautical bedding set.


Some of the baby gear: high chair, stroller, car seat
The book "Baby Bargains" was a lifesaver! I highly recommend it.

My husband assembling the high chair

A smile for just completing the car seat assembly

Boy oh boy!

We waited in suspense this morning as the ultrasound technician pointed out all different aspects of our little one's body. It was truly amazing to see little fists clench, tiny legs kick, wee feet squirm, and a small head turn. She measured the waist and the head, and showed us the baby's heart up close, and turned on sound so we could hear it beat.

Finally, she began to type, "Little..." That got my attention. My eyes glued even a little more firmly to the screen.

It's a little boy!

We are both delighted, my husband maybe a little more so, because he's really wanted a boy from the beginning, and has been next to positive in the past months that our little one is male.

Our little boy may be quite a handful. This could be a shocker because both my husband and I tend to be on the quieter side (as children and adults). He was squirming and wiggling all over, as if he were playing one of his first games of hide and seek with us. It was actually quite humorous, as he would pop up on the ultrasound screen for a few seconds and then sink back away into my uterus, with his hands in front of him. He was probably getting a bit disgusted with all the poking from the ultrasound wand.

I've already purchased his crib bedding; I had my eye on a great deal on a cute nautical set at Overstock.com. Most likely, it will still be online tomorrow, and for days after that, but I wanted to be sure. Poor kid doesn't have a name yet, but his nursery will be fully outfitted :-).

Oh, the joy of a boy! I can't wait to meet him.

Baby Phillips doing a little headstand for us. His head is on the bottom right.

Precious little life

Lately, I've been feeling tiny flickers of life from our precious baby. It's thrilling to have some real proof that the little one is stretching, growing, and learning how to be a person who can live on his or her own someday. It seems these sensations are a tad more frequent each day—or perhaps I am recognizing the feeling just a bit more.

I read that feeling an unborn baby move is like popcorn popping or a gold fish swimming. I don't know about you, but I've never swallowed kernels and hopped in the microwave, or downed a pet fish and experienced an opposite Jonah effect. I'm not sure that these descriptions were exactly helpful. But what I do feel are little flicks, as if someone is lightly flicking me with an index finger—except from the inside. That may be just as vague and hard to imagine, but I think it makes a bit more sense.

The whole concept of having a child who will live with us and be ours is getting a little more real and a little more exciting as the pregnancy progresses. It is still somewhat odd to think about—us changing our lives to be parents. I've heard many a person say since I announced the baby's May arrival that it will transform our lives more than we know. I imagine it will—and I can't wait.

A beautiful heart

Yesterday my husband and I were again delighted to hear the tiny heart of our little one beat: swoosh, swoosh, swoosh. It is a phenomenal feeling to recognize that a small person is growing inside of me. Some days, it's even hard to believe. But the heartbeat leaves no room for denial.

The doctor said the baby was squirming around quite a bit, which made it tricky to find the heartbeat for a few seconds. I couldn't feel him or her move, but it was fun to think about the wee one wiggling and imagine how it must look.

The next doctor's appointment in about a month brings more excitement: Finding out the baby's gender.

I hear over and over again that I should enjoy these moments since the child will soon arrive and our lives will be fuller than ever before. So we're trying to be patient, but we're also overflowing with anticipation. A boy? A girl? My husband is convinced our little one is a boy, but only time will tell :-).

And then there were three...

I'm delighted to announce that our family is growing to three. Our little new little miracle, straight from God, will arrive in the beginning of May.

What inexpressible joy! I can't wait to hold our baby in my arms, caress little fingers, touch a precious nose, and softly tickle tiny toes. I can hardly believe the precious bundle will be ours.

Yesterday, I heard his or her heartbeat, which made the whole pregnancy seem a great deal more real. It made a gentle swooshing sound; I caught my husband's eye as we both grinned widely.

Now that's real delight.

One of our baby's first portraits, taken September 18

The glory of green

My husband and I enjoyed a splendid vacation to the Northeastern U.S. and the Canadian Maritime provinces in early September. We saw historic places and buildings on the Freedom Trail in Boston and little towns in Maine, and had the pleasure of spending time with two cousins and an aunt and uncle in New Brunswick.

The ultimate goal of the trip (from my perspective) was Prince Edward Island, where acres and acres of perfectly manicured, lush lawns were accompanied by red, storybook barns. Even though rain fell frequently, the trip was full of sunshine. We visited breezy, beautiful beaches, encountered friendly people, and spent time traipsing through Anne of Green Gables attractions (admittedly the reason we were there—I admired all the stuff of little girl dreams and imagined Anne herself, while my husband patiently accompanied me).

Even if I had never loved Anne or her playful, pretend world, I would still have deeply admired PEI. It is truly a beautiful part of God's beautiful world. As Anne once said, "The world looks like something God had just imagined for His own pleasure, doesn't it?"

Green Gables, a Canadian National Historic Site, sits on a perky green lawn on a very rainy day.
The building nearly became a clubhouse for a nearby golf course.

Anne Shirley's bedroom, in the Green Gables house around which the author created the story.